Kanyenji
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Take heart dear

Take caution in love

TAKE HEART DEAR
“Steve you know what, it’s over between me and you.” Mary said as she fixed her eyes on mine. “I know everything you have been cheating on me.”
“But Mary please .”
“No I can’t take any more of this ,I thought you were supposed to take care of me, my feelings, you are such a…….”
“Am so sorry……….”I tried to plead her but this was not the moments when I was to let my mouth speak out for me.
“Goodbye……” she said as she let go of my hand,this time I had lost .I was trying to make friendship with one of her friends, Nancy but damn it, where did she get this rumors that I was in love with her ? Rumors sometimes they can be false and ruin our lives.
I went home that evening feeling heartbroken ,she met much to me, I had been dating her for several years and I was telling my mind, my heart this was the woman whom I would spend the rest of my life with but now see what it all turned out to. I had noticed from our usual talks she didn’t want to speak much to me and when I consulted her she said she was ok, and now it was over. Right was the one who said you cannot just forget someone in just a moment, it may take forever.
********************************************
Several weeks down the line I was trying to live life all alone. I had promised myself for several times not to fall in love, I had tried it several times and results was 0
, I was even strong, if it was in class I could have quitted long ago. At least I was trying to erase Mary in my life ,it was not that easy.
It was a cold chilly evening, and I was lying sluggishly in my bed, when I got a call from Mary. At first I was so astonished not even able to answer the call but when she called twice I gained courage took a deep breath and then answered.
“Can I help you…….”
“Am sorry I………….. Ahmmm..” she stammered.
“What?”
“Can I meet you tonight please …..”
“But Mary…””
“I know.”
We planned to meet our usual place, where we used to meet when we dated ,in a lonely street in our estate, I preferred this place, It had quit some good privacy, this was some part of abandoned houses ,good for smoking weed or have some passionate romance, She still looked sweet but I didn’t want to contradict myself, she had left me for a good excuse and there was no way I was going to let her back.
“Well…….nice to see you back once again .” she said as soon as our eyes met.
“Ok fine am here, tell me what do you want?” I tried to sound rude.
“Is my guy still after me or is there somebody in my place?”
“Well I didn’t come for this I guess I might be going anytime now………” I snapped back walking away.
“Am sorry ….I just came to invite you over to my place tomorrow, it will be my younger sister’s birthday, she is turning 17 maybe you can come over.”
“I will let you know,” I said walking away I was confused, was she trying to bring back the long gone friendship? And if yes then why? I thought I was not good enough for her,
That night I thought hard trying to make a decision on whether to go or not. I came up with an idea yes I would go but I would take pretty good care of myself. I didn’t want to get myself back to those mistakes I had committed.
It was time to go and for once in a long time I went to her place, the last time I had gone to her place was this time she was not feeling good and things became loose, we let feelings take control of us, thanks God she was on her periods. The place was occupied to its fullest and there were plenty of alcohol, music, it was total happiness but still I remained in my policies.
“Nice to see you around.”Mary hissed as she hugged me from my back. “Well I thought you wouldn’t turn up, the look on your face last night was fucking terrible.”
“I just came for a few moments say hi to you guys and then………..”
“Then what leave? You know what Steve, I can’t just understand what’s happening to you tell me, what happened?”
“Nothing I am good.”
We talked for a few moments with her and when it was time to go ,she still didn’t want me to go, I could see she was feeling something for me, but why could I let her back anyway?
“I want to talk to you, something that’s happening to me, it’s not that I want you back, but Steve…” she took a deep breath.
“There is no but.”
“We can’t talk about it here right now, please come with me.”She said pulling me way upstairs, she was taking me to her room and when we got in there she locked the door in and pushed me on the bed. There was still loud music but we could hear each other without having to shout.
“What-?’’
“You fucking listen to me.”She was a little bit drunk I could see it right from her actors. “You listen to me, i know I made a wrong decision, I was quick to anger, I know I was the one who was wrong ,Steve, am sorry for hurting you, I know it was all my fault..”She said bursting out into tears, she looked terrible while crying, more over she was drank. I was silent for a while and I watched her crying, It’s not that I did not have feelings, but I did not want to rush into doing things a step at a time.
“Don’t cry …..”
“Please Steve ,am sorry, we can start it all over again, am ready to love you right again, That time I saw you with your mommy ,last Sunday you looked great and I fell deep for you ,please reconsider me.”
I raised her from my feet and let her lay on my thighs, the love I had built for her then still was not gone, I could feel it. I hadn’t done a thing when she hugged me and I held her tight.
“I will always love you Steve.”
“It’s ok.” I responded, I felt this was the right reply. She planted kiss on my lips and I could feel her lips being cold, I hadn’t said a yes to her, but still I couldn’t be able to stop her. We pushed each other to the wall each wanting to be the one to be the one in charge; it was like nothing had ever happened before. What was this? We were tearing each other’s attires down, I had never seen her so hot like she was this time around, it was like I was henpecked, and there was nothing I could do but when it was too much I sprang up.
“We can’t do it Mary, I don’t have any protection.”
“I am on my pills.” She said as she spread her hand along my body and let my in her, that’s what she wanted and I couldn’t stop her.
It was different, I had tried to plead her let me do it before but she always said a no. I hoped there was nothing that was behind all this. when the deal is good………….?
We had several rounds of pretty good sex before we both lay on her bed. This was my life time dream and now I had had it granted to me, she was now back in my life and I was going to love her like I was going to lose her.
I woke up early enough and wanted to leave for home ,but as I was dressing I noticed some papers slightly under her bed and I was kind of curious and wanted to know what they were all about .They were printed and the first thing I noticed was the hospital name in it..
I quickly perused through them and realized these were a sample of pregnancy results from the doctor. I checked under her bed and I could confirm she had tested herself maybe some hours ago and it was positive,She had put me in a trap.’
I walked out with the tests and walked home felling confused like I was going to die the next minute. I slept in the wee hours of morning and when I woke up, there were several missed calls from Mary, I was not in the mood to talk to her anyway, what was she up to I wondered this time around remaining silent not even wanting to ask about the pregnancy test.
I didn’t talk to her and later four days she called and told me she wanted to meet me and when we meet, she looked like as if she had been crying.
“I am pregnant.” she busted out.
“What do you mean I said trying to act like I was worried?”
“The pills bounced I am pregnant, you got me pregnant.”
“Well that’s a great thing, I know everything.”
“What?”
“I know you have been wondering but I am the one who took your doctor’s results, am sorry.”I said walking away. She was mesmerized and was completely soaked into tears.
“Please it’s not what you think.”
“Am sorry I won’t fall into your trap, am sorry…..”
I said walking away. I have never seen her, maybe her parents and her moved on to another estate, sometimes I miss her, but I wonder what could be of me if I fell in for her, I tried thrice to call her, but my calls couldn’t go through. Well young girl take care of yourself wherever you might be……………………………………………………….
*************
Yah
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